So the other day I was on the bus, going to work (a job i really would rather not have except that I need the money to pay for computers, Mac OSX, coffee, Chinese steamed buns and video games etc). Some fucktard gets on the bus, wearing one of those hoodies that looks like a Jackson Polluk had a seizure at the sweatshop, sneakers with dayglow laces and his pants tucked into the laces comes up on the bus, opens up his laptop and starts mixing beats.

As if that’s appropriate?

Maybe it is. Maybe I’m out of touch with the modern world. I know I don’t know the latest styles or fashions or music. I still think that Emo is for 11 year old girls and if you listen to Emo then you ARE an 11 year old girl. Even if you are a half-bald 29 year old with a pirate flag tattooed on your chest.

Well, normally this sort of assmastery dosn’t bother me too much. I just turn on my iPod and then I’m good. Except the other day I took a slip on some blackice and there was a casualty. NO! not my iPod! I have an awesome iPod case that I firmly believe is bulletproof. It was my thermos. Full of coffee.

Oh how pissed I was. But why is that important? Well, a quart of coffee got dumped into my murse (Yes… I carry around a man-purse but I am still all man. With a pirateflag tattooed on his chest) and soaked my headphones. And I can’t put coffee in my ears.

My doctor said that I’m not supposed to.

So I’m stuck on the bus, with some fartknocker mixing beats and yapping on his cellphone.

I got him to stop though. I’m not going to let that last for a full 45 minutes on a bus.

When we got to the local community college (because seriously, they let ANYONE other than me get a degree) the kid got off of the bus, slipped on some black ice, smashed the laptop and just sat there. On the cold pavement. Looking like a frikkin’ idiot.

It could only have been better if he had an “accident”. Or he broke his nose.

Or both.